The Serengeti

The Serengeti-

The Dolpin joins. Quick “Dolpin” etymology: Matt Fraser once went by the nickname “The Dolphin” to a select group of friends. When he went to get that name tattooed the artist left out the “h”, hence forth his name has been “The Dolpin”. The percentage of people that used his nickname when addressing him went from his select group of friends to anybody that’s ever met him and then some. Much like another friend, Stinky, who’s nickname just stuck, and who’s real name also happens to be Matt (note to self, don’t name any kids Matt), I’ve been asked on a few occasions “what’s Dolpin’s real name anyway?” My response- “just call him Dolpin… And ask him to show you the tattoo on top of it”. The Dolpin is cut from the same cloth as me in the sense of him coming from the Vegas nightlife industry and parked that life to pursue full time travel. Dolpin is the only friend from back home doing the same as me and before he set off we had hopes of meeting up at some point. He arrived just after I finished Kilimanjaro and I’m happy to spend my last 2 weeks with him before returning home. He’s 3 months in now which gives me a new, albeit already well traveled, vagabond Jedi to pass off a few travel tricks to. There is also the added advantage of reminiscing about old times and talking about the current affairs of mutual friends which will no doubt help me reacclimatize a bit into life back home.

Our goal was to check out the Serengeti and after unwinding in our Arusha hostel a few days we bargained for a good deal on a 6 day safari. We were to be joining a solo male traveler and before meeting up we did some profile guessing as a goof and with the loser dropping for 30 push-ups on the spot. My guess was that he would be ex military, formerly based in Africa who returned for the safari he always wanted to do, but never got around to it, he had a girl back home as a love interest, but the constant traveling proved too difficult for a long distance relationship. The Dolpin’s guess was that he taught English in a different African country where he currently resides, was on a short vacation from work and decided to spend it in the Serengeti, he would be socially awkward with only 2 or 3 girlfriends in his lifetime making him all but a virgin. We ended up splitting the profile down the middle. Mike, from New Zealand, was living in Ethiopia working in logistics for an oil company, on vacation in Serengeti (point Dolpin), and he recently ended a relationship because of the long distance (point me). Instead of doing 15 push-ups each we considered it a wash. Half way through the first day we were told there would be 2 more people joining us. Dolpin started the guessing again, a friendly game this time and no wager. “A couple in mid 40’s from Germany”. My guess was more wishful thinking than a telepathy attempt- “two hot 22 year old Thai chicks”. When the taxi stops an older couple get out, older than mid 40’s, but miles away from two hot Thai chicks. When they approach the truck we say hello. The response- “bonjour!”. I let out an internal sigh, drop my head and sink back into my seat. It’s a pair of French retirees. (Reference to my previous African Safari trip)

As I said before, except for a few isolated incidences, I didn’t really mind the group of French retirees from the last trip I was on. What most everyone else considered difficult or annoying I found comical most of the time. I got along with them and appreciated how much they enjoyed themselves. The only problem was they made it France vs the group, creating some awkward moments at times. The big difference this time was that there were only two of them instead of 7. They were both very sweet people and the 5 of us meshed well together. The couple had one beef and it seemed like a legitimate one. They booked and paid for a more luxury safari than the one they ended up on. They had a print out itinerary showing names of the lodges they were supposed to be sleeping in, which didn’t happen. The Dolpin and I were expecting only we we paid for- tents. This oversight by the company of mixing an accommodated group with our camping group worked in our favor. Because there is only 1 cook they couldn’t have us stay in two different areas so we got upgraded to rooms all but 1 night. In the Serengeti after having dinner and dropping off the French couple, the three of us guys get driven a few miles up the road and are expecting the worst spider and mosquito infested room imaginable. What we are given is our own 2 bedroom house, complete with private bathrooms and a satellite dish TV showing reruns of Alf. One of the enlightening things about hindsight is the proof of just how bad 80’s sitcoms really were. I enjoyed the company of the French couple, but the woman starting getting miserably sick after the first day. Her throat tickle thing became a wheezing phlegm filled hack and rendered her speechless. She had to massage her throat with her finger to get a few pieces of toast down during breakfast while at the time I’m running the Heimlich maneuver hand positions over in my head just in case. They ended up leaving a day early because of it, which in my opinion was about 2 days too late judging by the sound of her gurgling.

Along the way on the safari we stopped by several points of interest. The Lake Manyara Reserve that is still recovering from a massive flood 8 months ago, the Ngorongoro crater, which is a wildlife rich volcano caldera. Tarangire National Park, once famous as a hunting reserve and now claims to have one of the densest population of elephants in Africa due to the abundant baobab trees. We visited a local village of the Maasai people, and passed over the great Rift Valley which is arguably the evolutionary birthplace of Homo Erectus and the modern man. As expected though our 3 days in the Serengeti stole the show.

A good thing about visiting a few game parks before Serengeti is that I understand how rare it is to see certain animals and I can appreciate it when it happens. In three days in The Serengeti, in addition to countless elephants, zebras, giraffes, baboons, and various species of antelope, we saw 2 leopards come out of a tree and walk directly in front of our truck to stalk a group of nearby impalas, a hippo crossing the middle of the road, a cheetah chasing a herd of gazelle and we lost track of our lion count somewhere around 75. Some adult females stalking, a honeymooning male and female mating, some cubs nursing and a few feasting on a fresh kill. As we looked on while the lions tore apart meat from the bones we tried making out exactly what it was they were eating. This question was put to rest by simply looking in the opposite direction where a few hundred zebras stood sad faced watching their homey getting eaten up. It’s like losing a girl to a strip club- that’s somebody’s daughter.

Just like vultures circling a carcass, safari trucks will swarm with the sighting of any large cat. The first time we stopped to see a pride of lions our guide says “just be patient, I know how to see lions, just sit tight and trust me”. For a long time we waited, staring at the barely visible tops of lion heads behind the bush as they slept, while safari trucks came and went in both directions. Finally, one by one, all trucks leave in frustration and we are the only ones left. “Camera’s on” the guide says, then makes a turn past the “off-roading is strictly prohibited” sign and straight for the pride. We now understand what he meant by “sit tight and trust me”. The truck pulls right in the middle of the massive cats for an opportunity of some amazing candid photos. The sleeping lions barely took notice of us and couldn’t be less bothered by our questionable maneuver. We cheered and thanked the driver afterwards. From then on whenever we were left alone for a few seconds near some lions I’d lean forward and ask the guide “cameras on?” A few more times he would look around and say “ok cameras on”, to which we cheered again.

As this 6 day excursion winded down I was definitely safari’d out and couldn’t take another gazelle. During the game drive on the last day I nodded off half the time. “Just wake me if there is a live kill about to happen”. By the end of my African odyssey a live kill is about the only thing I hadn’t seen. All in all, 8 national parks/game reserves including the famed Kalahari Desert, the Okavango Delta and now the Serengeti. It’s a safe assumption that I’ll be ruined on zoos as long as I live.

Bob