The confirmation button

The confirmation button-

The place I originally wanted to end my trip was at the Giza Pyramids of Egypt, but ongoing violence and the real threat of a public uprising resulting in government overthrow pumped the breaks on that plan. Israel and Jordan were both high on the wish list until the unrest in neighboring Syria escalated, blurring my sights of that as well. Finally I wanted to visit Kenya after my time in Tanzania, but the recent hostage situation targeting Christians, and ending in 60 deaths, also moved that plan to the back burner for another time. Because of all those developments I started to put serious thought into, and began to embrace the idea of, returning to the states. Just before leaving for Kilimanjaro I pressed the ‘confirm purchase’ button for my return ticket home. A wave of mixed emotions ran their course immediately.

Before pressing the button it was mostly excitement. Seeing LAS in the ‘to’ box of the flight search engine for the first time in over a year gave me a thrill. Even more so with the ‘one way’ option highlighted. A half smile crept over my face with the idea of flying into the halo of Vegas Valley’s lights, undoubtedly sharing the plane with high energy revelers holding closely the big Vegas dream. First time visitors who just watched The Hangover for the 7th time. Soon I’d be walking through McCarren airport. The sound of slot machines, the familiar smell, the not needing to look at signs to find my way around. Walking through baggage claim with images for entertainment options I had already seen in person. Walking outside to the street and not being harassed by tuk tuk drivers begging to drive me to the hotel of their choice for a commission. The short ride on the 215, down my street and to my house where I’ll be reunited with my boys Rocky and Apollo. Going to bed on the perfect king size mattress that I haven’t slept on in almost 2 years where I’ll wake up to a familiar world again.

As soon as I pressed down, and without even removing my finger from the button yet, the wave came over me and my thoughts shifted. I lifted my finger. It’s over. The most amazing year of my life is rapidly coming to an end. 2 more weeks and I’ll be back in Las Vegas. Back to a place that’s not new nor unknown. Undoubtedly sharing the plane with high energy revelers holding closely the big Vegas dream. First time visitors who just watched The Hangover for the 7th time. Soon I’d be walking through McCarren airport. The noisy slot machines, the smell of stale beer, Cinnabon and sweat. Walking through baggage claim and being pummeled with in your face advertising you can’t escape. Getting stopped by the disgruntled traffic guard so he can let the taxi rank fill up before crossing over to the final moving walkway. Waiting at passenger pickup as SUV’s too big pass by playing music too loud and who’s wheels alone can sustain a school in a Cambodian village for 2 years. Driving down the same old road and waking up to a world I know all too well.

This is commonly referred to as reverse culture shock. Experiencing the simplicity of the world and returning to infomercials, fast food and over abundance. I overheard a conversation in a hostel not long ago that had one girl say “after traveling you get to appreciate the things you have more”. I was just passing by and didn’t interject, but thought to myself she couldn’t have been more wrong. The reality is that after traveling you understand the overwhelming majority of the things you have you don’t actually need. The realization that the best things in life aren’t “things”. Returning to the home you know which is still the same and your the one that’s changed, this is reverse culture shock. It began to hit me already just by pressing the confirmation button.

My saving grace is the answer to obvious follow up question- What next? The answer is partially the reason I booked my flight when I did. To borrow a Chris McCandless line from Into The Wild- “I’m going to live this life for some time to come. The freedom and simple beauty is just too good to pass up”. There is an unbelievable amount of places I still need to visit and things I still want to experience. 1 year has such a nice ring to it and even though 10 months is a nice round number, it’s not a year. The fact that I am perfectly fine with returning home now, I believe, is a reflection that I’m still free enough to make that decision. I’m not limited to a year and don’t feel the need to prove myself. I want to return. I want to see my family and friends. So I am. After 14 months in Australasia, 6 months in Asia and 2 months in Africa it’s time to come home.

There are a lot of things on my wish list for 2014: The great American road trip, Canada, Alaska, a month in South America, a month in Eastern Europe, snowboarding North America, Scandinavia, a long distance cycling tour, another triathlon, the World Cup, Coachella, Burning Man, the Northern Lights, Antarctica, opening day at Wrigley, learn Spanish, pick up guitar. So much to do that I can’t do it all. For now I have only 1 concrete plan. Regrouping in Vegas for a month then going to visit my parents for Christmas. From there I maintain the philosophy that I picked up early this year and stick to it- the best plan is no plan.

Although it’s the final curtain for this trip, it’s only intermission and a scene change for the journey. I’m going to make the most of my last 2 weeks abroad and I look forward to seeing you all in Vegas!

Bob